News coverage - is this right?

[Katzateer]

Anyone in the Philly area yesterday has heard about the horrible torture and murder of a 3 year old boy that was on the news yesterday.

I am really upset about the reports I have read. The boyfriend and girlfriend were charged with murder. The "man's" wife with child endangerment charges for failure to report the abuse. The wife was the person to call the police about the boy.

I worked with the wife and my daughter was friends with her at work. We knew she had problems but she came to work, did her job, and was a girl we liked.

About 4 months ago her husband told her he wanted a divorce, was having an affair, and she was very upset. Oh, and they ave a now 11 month old baby.

I can't even imagine the way she was feeling with no escape from the situation. Probably depression and possibly abuse. She was trying to find a place to live but I guess from the paper article was still in a trailer with her husband, his girlfriend and her 2 children.

My question is in the articles they state the man and woman were charged with murder, the girl we know from work with failure to report the crime. Her picture is plastered all over the news. I am surprised her picture is in the papers since she wasn't charged with the murder. As horrible as all this is, I don't think her picture should be included. It makes it look like she is one of the people that tortured and murdered this poor child when you look at the news.

Am I wrong to think this???

Oh, and the husband and girlfriend worked at the same place we worked at. They worked night shift (never met them) and our friend worked days. Maybe that was why she was still living in the same place since they were gone when she was home at night.

So sad for the little boy . And his 6 year old brother.

[wildernesslady]

The abuse this little boy and his brother suffered was horrendous. A child should be able to trust their parent to keep them safe.

Your friend should be held accountable also. Even is she was not there when the abuse happened because of shift work, she had to have been aware of the situation. The final episode lasted three days. There is no way she did not witness or hear any of the suffering.

[BrerGnat]

The abuse this little boy and his brother suffered was horrendous. A child should be able to trust their parent to keep them safe.

Your friend should be held accountable also. Even is she was not there when the abuse happened because of shift work, she had to have been aware of the situation. The final episode lasted three days. There is no way she did not witness or hear any of the suffering.

I agree with this. And apparently this 3 day incident was not the first. If you are living in a home with kids and they are being abused, you know it. Who watched the kids at night if both parents worked the same shift?

Sorry, your friend is culpable here. If she was also being threatened, she should have gone to the police, moved out, etc.

[LandFan]

Yeah - I live in the area. Yeah I heard about it - I'm a teacher - it makes me sick. I think they are all culpable. She should have reported the very first beating the very first time it happened. Then it might not have gotten to this last three day event (that she HAD to know about living there) and he would not have died. He might have been a much happier child, albeit in foster care, and she might have been in a shelter until she found a better place to be but that's what you do to keep kids safe. Sorry - her mistake is too big to forgive in this case.

[disneymom15]

So horrible, that poor little boy. This is the first I've heard of it. I agree with previous posters, the wife is culpable.

[Katzateer]

I agree. Just makes me sick. Guess I was just surprised to see her picture. Hope she can get the help she needs. Her 11 month old was able to be taken care of by her parents out of state. I think the 6 year old was turned over to foster care.

Not sure why she just didn't leave when her husband told her about the affair and she was struggling to figure out where to go and what to do. It all happened fast and she was still in shock that he was having an affair. And she seemed confused about what she could do. It is amazing that someone can do a good job at work and have all the other horrible things going on in their lives.

It has been strange around here for the past week. One co- worker's husband died in a car accident last week. And a woman was killed at a YMCA- her ex shot her in the parking lot then killed himself. One of the ladies I work with her daughter works at that Y and they were on lockdown about the time all the kids in daycare woud have been going home. Thank goodness the shooting did not happen in the Y building. He was waiting for her in the parking lot- she was just getting to work to teach a fitness class.

[PirateLover]

This is quite possibly one of the most horrific stories I've ever come across. I have to agree with the other posters... She had to have known something was going on. And in the reports I read, it seems like this was not a one time thing. It was ongoing abuse. So the failure to report could stem from other incidents. PA is very strict with child abuse. I think most of the articles make it clear that she was not an abuser, but that she did live with them and was charged with failure to report.

[TheDuckRocks]

Awful! What a sad story and so much more has probably gone on here that isn't being reported yet. My guess would be the wife and her children have also suffered abuse at the hands of this man. Sadly her not telling someone leaves her as guilty as the 2 who did the actual killing.

[Hammer]

This is quite possibly one of the most horrific stories I've ever come across. I have to agree with the other posters... She had to have known something was going on. And in the reports I read, it seems like this was not a one time thing. It was ongoing abuse. So the failure to report could stem from other incidents. PA is very strict with child abuse. I think most of the articles make it clear that she was not an abuser, but that she did live with them and was charged with failure to report.

Sadly her not telling someone leaves her as guilty as the 2 who did the actual killing.

This story, as well as the story of the woman who was abducted off the street, has been dominating local news. The woman who was abducted has a happy ending. That's partially because someone stepped up and said something when they noticed something wasn't right. Sadly, the other story had a horrible ending partially because your friend didn't speak up when she had the chance.

[Katzateer]

This story, as well as the story of the woman who was abducted off the street, has been dominating local news. The woman who was abducted has a happy ending. That's partially because someone stepped up and said something when they noticed something wasn't right. Sadly, the other story had a horrible ending partially because your friend didn't speak up when she had the chance.

It is amazing what the abducted woman thought to do to help herself. So glad she had a happy ending.

[SBETigg]

I'm sorry that you have a personal connection to that awful news story, Debbi. Keep in mind that people are not always who they seem/what they present in public. Likely that she lived through the ex's abuse, too, and it's really hard to judge not knowing her state of mind. But when there's a child involved and such horrendous abuse, you can't imagine how anyone could stand by and allow it.

I think she is probably going to do some jail time for her part in not reporting this until it was really too late, and she's culpable for that. The child would probably be alive if she'd reported what she knew earlier, and from what I've read, she did know what was happening to the children in the house. It's heartbreaking. I'm sorry for all the other bad news you've faced lately, too.

[minnie04]

I am sick to my stomach. I just read this story and can't believe they ALL did this to this little boy. Weither you hit or stood by you (they) should all rot in !! OMG!! Are you kidding me hanging a child by their feet and punching them in the face. I would give my life if I ever saw someone trying to do this to my child. NOT stand there and laugh.. SICK, SICK individuals especially the MOTHER I’m sorry, but in 2014 there are so many ways for women to get help when they need it or want it. You were alone in that house when they were at work WHY didn’t you ever try to get help??? WHY? WHY? WHY? This was not the first time this happend. RIP little Scotty your an angel now pain free. No one can ever hurt you again

[BriarRose0708]

I really feel for all involved with these awful stories coming from the Philly area right now. When it rains, it pours!

I read an article recently that points out the inequity of 'failure to report' laws in various states. While yes, if you know abuse is going on you should report it, period. However, in context this is more likely easier said than done, and most times where there is child abuse there are other domestic abuse issues. It circles back to the "why didn't she leave?" "Why didn't she just say something?" argument that's stemmed from the Ray Rice domestic abuse scandal. It's just not that cut and dry sometimes, but the laws haven't caught up to the social stigma of domestic abuse. In many states, women like Debbi's coworker receive harsher sentences than their abusers, and that it more unjust, in my opinion.

[minnie04]

Nikki,

I do understand what you are saying about "easier said than done" BUT and A BIG BUT at that. When you see your child hanging by their feet being beaten. SOMETHING has to click in your mind that this is not right and the first chance you have to do something you should. It is so sad that it is always the child that dies AND then the help comes. And now they will all sit in an air condition cell and be feed three meals a day for however long and it’s done. Makes me so angry…

[Janmac]

Clearly she is culpable. While it's incomprehensible to me, I see this sort of thing - the why didn't they [whatever] situation - too much around here.

I think it stems from lack of basic lessons while growing up. Less desirable folks raising kids who turn into adults that can't think for themselves. Add in lower economic status, lack of education, and low self esteem, and it's a basic recipe for disaster.

A girl who was in the same grade as my grandson had a room in some place my grandson referred to as a crack house with her two kids. At less than 20 years old. She claimed she didn't know what else to do and probably didn't. She had her kids taken away and was in jail awhile because of her poor decision making matrix.

Unfortunately going to jail didn't improve her problem solving skills or reset the first 20 years of bad parenting. Counseling in jail could help.

Jan

[momef3grls]

I work in emergency services approximately 40 minutes north from where this happened. I can tell you it has affected us all. That poor child and his brother endured more than anyone in a lifetime should. Unfortunately I know more details than I care to know but it is part of the job. This angel will hopefully gain his wings again and have a spectacular life with someone who will never show him pain. What was released to the news is nothing compared to what really happened, I am not able to share more than that.

[MNNHFLTX]

This story is beyond horrific. No doubt that your co-worker was afraid, conflicted and not thinking straight. Still--children are totally innocent and vulnerable in our society; if a child's parent will not speak up and protect them, who will? The father and girlfriend clearly have no conscience. If the mother does she will have to live with the knowledge that she failed her child for the rest of her life, even beyond the scope of the law.

[Katzateer]

I haven't heard much about this story since the day they were arrested. I kind of expected news reporters to be all over the place since all 3 of the adults worked at the Walmart in this small PA borough.

The girl I know was not the child's mother. The 2 boys were the children of the girlfriend from a previous relationship. The girl I know is the mother of the 11 month old.

I can only imagine the horrible things you know about the case. A friend works as a pediatric nurse at Children's in Cincinnati and the news only tells part of the story in abuse cases. I have also worked in the office with child protective services in the Indiana Welfare system years ago and saw many many sad cases.