rug pulled out from under me

[Stitchahula]

I had started to write about our MAW trip but I can't seem to find it in me to anymore. I might later but right now it just all seems like a big fat lie. Little did I know that while we were away on this incredible magic trip my husband was all set up in another place, complete with furniture. The week after we got home he had his lawyer file divorce papers. He just told me the other day, so I wouldn't be surprised when the guy shows up to serve me. He had been planning this for months and give me a couple of days notice so I wouldn't be surprised, I was floored (literally, I sank to the floor and started to throw up). He already has the temporary custody all set I should get them in a couple of weeks he said. I get the kids during the week and he gets them on weekends. Oh so I get them when they are in school and he gets all the free time, sounds fair right. I just don't know what to do. I had no idea this was coming. We've had our problems but we weren't even fighting lately. I thought we were on our way to building our marriage up again, spending more time together, boy was I mistaken. I feel like such a fool. Is this how these things are done? Is it normal to completely blind side the spouse like this? If you are wondering why it came to this it's because of his family. We don't get along and I don't trust them around my kids. They've proven to me on a number of occasions that they think nothing of my childrens safety or well being. I never stopped them for seeing the kids (which they hardly ever do) I just have said I wanted to be there to keep an eye on my kids. Thanks for letting me vent.

[DisneyMom12]

Coreen, I am so sorry you are going through this. What a terrible way to find out. I would get my own lawyer asap, and get a better visitation schedule in place. ( Hugs)

[paulsheri]

The mid life crisis, I hear so many stories about the Husband Leaving the wife, in their early 40's, but I never hear the Wife Leaving because of it. Prayers to you and the children, and I hope things works out, more in your favor,,,

[NewDVCowner]

I am so sorry. I second the suggestion to get your own laywer ASAP. I had a friend that just got through this and having a good lawyer made a world of difference.

[BrerGnat]

My goodness, I am so sorry you are going through this right now. I really have nothing to offer in terms of advice, but I can offer my wholehearted support and a virtual hug. We are here for you, and hopefully, someone else will be along to offer some useful advice for your situation. You will get though this and come out stronger on the other side. That's how us moms roll. Hang in there!

[crazypoohbear]

Just because HE said that is what HIS lawyer drew up as a custody arrangement doesn't make it so!
He can say anything he wants, the JUDGE is the person who will decide things. and the fact that he doesn't spend time with his kids now, that he has never cared for a sick child or a special needs child means that he isn't capable of doing so every weekend!
I can tell you I want custody for three weekends a month and draw up papers saying that. Doesn't mean it will happen.
Don't accept anything he has to say as the truth. He has already proven himself to be a sneak and a liar. Nothing he says or does is in the best interest of his children

[faline]

I'm so sorry! Please get legal advice to protect your interests. Please reach out to friends, family, and others who can support you on a daily basis.

[MNNHFLTX]

I'm so sorry for all of this, Coreen--I can only imagine what is going through your head and heart. Know that we are here for you, whenever you need an empathetic ear and a

[Jillirose]

You will get though this and come out stronger on the other side. That's how us moms roll. Hang in there!

Amen! You can do hard things - one step at a time. Keep your chin up, put one foot in front of the other and take care of yourself, so you can be there for your kids.

[VWL Mom]

Just because HE said that is what HIS lawyer drew up as a custody arrangement doesn't make it so!
He can say anything he wants, the JUDGE is the person who will decide things. and the fact that he doesn't spend time with his kids now, that he has never cared for a sick child or a special needs child means that he isn't capable of doing so every weekend!
I can tell you I want custody for three weekends a month and draw up papers saying that. Doesn't mean it will happen.
Don't accept anything he has to say as the truth. He has already proven himself to be a sneak and a liar. Nothing he says or does is in the best interest of his children

Exactly! Sounds like he is trying to bully you on top of everything else.

As others have said, we're here for you to vent, use as a sounding board, whatever. So sorry your family is going through this, stay strong.

[brownie]

Sorry to hear that. It sounds like you really got blindsided.

[luvdiznee]

I am so sorry as well that you are going through this. And having to find out this way shows he had no regards. I hope you find a good lawyer and get what you deserve as well.

Good luck!

[buzznwoodysmom]

I am so sorry you are having to go through this. I can't imagine coming home from a wonderful trip with my kids to find this out. I have no advice to offer you, but wanted to tell you to hang in there, stay tough, and good luck with everything.

[disneymom15]

Coreen, so sorry for what you're going thru. Good luck to you, hang in there, you'll get thru this.

[Jeff]

Wow! Such a rotten thing to do.
Hang in there!

[I LoveJack]

Hire a good attorney and since he is already wanting you to have temp custody, push for full. Make sure you have judge order child support also. Just because you agree to something out of court doesn't mean a hill of beans when something goes wrong and you try to inforce it. Good luck and hang in there. It will get better.

[SBETigg]

Wow. That's really low. Of course you're floored and hurting. Sounds like crazypoohbear is looking out for you, and she's right. Make sure you have a good lawyer. A good lawyer will give you the right advice on how to proceed in your best interests. So sorry!

[PlutoToo]

I don't have any advise, except to get a good lawyer to help you and protect your and your children's interests. Prayers for you support in this time of uncertainty.

[Dragongirlx]

What a horrible thing that he's done. Like everyone else says get your self a good lawyer.

[micky95]

get a good lawyer !I' ve been through this with my wife .i didnt blindside her but she knew it was coming.i gave her the house and we had joint custody of the kids.through this she used the kids as a weapon to get at me .there was no other woman but she did remarry 6 months after the divorce .i remarried 3 years later and got full custody of my youngest son( 9 at the time ),who loves his step mother more than me lol.ive now been happily married for 13 years. i KNOW its hard when children are involved but trust me you will get through this and be a better person. my sons are now 28 & 25 i have 4 grandkids which means i still have to see my ex sometimes at birthday parties and such.we're civil around each other and get along fine.hang in there and remember there's lighted at the end of the tunnel and no its not a train.