Back To School Rant

[VWL Mom]

Is it just me or does anyone else get this way at the beginning of school?

DS15 is a freshman at MHS and we are spending this dreary day getting everything ready. I already find myself aggravated, not a good way to start.

First, the supply list....$200 later with the economy what it is, why do we need a $100 graphing calculator? Why does each class need their own 2" hard cover notebook @ $9 each?
And I have to ask myself since this is a public school, what about those families that cannot afford it? What happens to them?

Second, the unending forms from each teacher. Why does a bio teacher need to know what DH does for a living? Is my child going to be graded based on income? Now I've signed off on all they expect from my son but where is a place for me to note what I expect from them? Having been through this school with DS18 I could give them a list!

Believe it or not, for the most part I do like the school just not the nonsense that goes with it.

Thanks for letting me vent. I feel better now.

[TheVBs]

HUGS! Sorry the school year is starting out so stressful. I experience some stress but for different reasons.

I know what you mean about that list. I opted to break ours up into several shopping trips to spread out the cost. Ours stressed that it wasn't required, to only buy the items if you could afford it. I'm assuming the school hopes that the families that can buy from the list help decrease the costs for the students they have to buy supplies for.

And, I would definitely suggest writing that list of expectations and sending it to the school! It doesn't have to be a negative or confrontational thing at all. You could present it as outlining some things you've seen as challenges in the past and include suggestions for making things smoother.

Hope your day gets better and I hope the school year goes well for all of you!

[SBETigg]

My daughter started her senior year last week, and I have to say that while I'm occasionally nostalgic for her youth, I'm ready for this last year and for what comes next. Of course, buying the school supplies only gets more expensive, plus tuition- my son is in college. But yes, I always wonder about the parents who can't really afford it having to try to get together all the stuff. It's enough to get them dressed to face another year, and then there's the whole list of supplies. And endless forms (another thing you don't escape when they head to college- even more forms).

My gripe about the school year is more time-related. How do they expect our kids to have time for everything? Hours of homework, sports, music. They're over-scheduled, I want to say, and yet we've managed to pull it all off year after year somehow. Oh and don't get me started on group projects. Not only having to work out how to do everything on your kid's schedule, you have to add someone else's into the mix. Group projects ought to be the kind that can be completed in class or don't assign them. What a pain.

[Pirate Granny]

Since my children went to catholic school...I really didn't complain about the supplies...just the cost...UGH...BUT group projects...I HATED..both for my children and when I went back to university...SLACKERS...enough said.

[PirateLover]

Giving a teacher's perspective here...
With supplies, I kind of agree with the graphing calculator. I mean perhaps if you are in advanced or AP classes you would have a real need for it, but I took regular math classes and really didn't use most of the functions on that calculator.

The notebooks... I have to be honest, I'm not even sure what kind of notebook you are referencing but for $9 it must have something special to it? Maybe not. When I taught in high school I preferred kids to have spiral notebooks with pages that ripped out because it was easier than having them lug around separate loose leaf tablets, and ripping pages out of marble copybooks ruins them and just looks sloppy.

As for the forms... the example question you give is pretty personal and I wouldn't ask it, but generally many teachers send home their own info sheets because it's a song and a dance to have to go to the office, get a hold of files for all your students , and get all the personal information together in case we ever need to contact you the parent. It's much easier for parents to take 2 minutes to fill out a form and send it back in so that we can hold onto it.

And the group projects. I try my best to have them done in class. The reason they even exist is because we are pretty much made to do them to have a variety of assessments. I didn't have so much of a problem with them in high school because I went to a private girls' school full of motivated students, but I had some terrible college experiences. I actually got pretty heated with a professor once because he was insinuating it was part of being in a group to get everyone to work together, when I had called this one group mate a bunch of times and emailed him repeatedly with no response, and then he was absent on presentation day. I CAN'T MAKE SOMEONE ANSWER THE PHONE OR SHOW UP!! Anyway, I always tell my students to let me know if someone isn't pulling their weight, and they need to do a self assessment and tell me exactly what they did for the project. Not all students in a group receive the same grade from me.

[RedSoxFan]

How about how much stuff they have to carry in their backpack? It is ridiculous. DD13 is recovering from a stress fracture in her back and she can't carry her backpack full of books. Her friends help her.

My other pet peeve is teachers assigning HW over the weekends and holiday breaks. Don't the kids deserve a weekend off like adults do from jobs and holiday breaks to spend time with family without carrying the books with them?

[BrerGnat]

My other pet peeve is teachers assigning HW over the weekends and holiday breaks. Don't the kids deserve a weekend off like adults do from jobs and holiday breaks to spend time with family without carrying the books with them?

Teachers don't get weekends off. They spend them either grading papers, writing the next week's lesson plans, or going into the classroom to do extra prep work there.

I always got homework over weekends. It was MY responsibility to manage my time to get it done, and go to work, and have my personal time. I would always do my homework on Friday afternoons, so I would have all my weekends free. It's just about teaching time management skills, which they will need in college and beyond. TRUST ME, you don't get "weekends off" in college...

[Dsnygirl]

Boy oh boy do I hear you guys.... not everything commented on applies to us, but some sure does!

Our supply lists this year weren't that bad, thank goodness, as my DD12 needed a graphing calculator for an accelerated math class, and that took any small savings from the lighter supply lists right away!

The one thing that gets me every year is the homework. Not that they have some -- I expect them to, and it's good for them. What I DON'T like is when they come home with stuff to do that wasn't covered in class b/c the teacher couldn't get to it (which I totally understand, things come up and schedules for what needs to be covered have to change) but then they expect the parents to go over it and teach the kids how to do it! We've even had our kids' math teachers send home pamphlets so that the parents can learn how to do the "new math" that is being taught everywhere -- so that we can go over what isn't covered in class. WHAT?? Not okay with me -- I've been through school, I did my work -- I don't want to spend a couple of hours some nights reading and doing a math pamphlet so I can then try to teach my DD the concepts the teacher couldn't get to. (and they expect the kids to come in knowing it, so they can "move on to the next topic the next day.)

I don't mind helping my girls with their homework -- it's a part of parenting, and we're their teachers, too. My DH and I have both done our fair share of quizzing them for spelling and science tests, guiding them with special projects (and maybe even getting too involved with them b/c it's kinda fun... ) But I sure as heck don't want to have to re-learn my own math skills so I can do it the "new" way, and then have to teach it to my girls b/c there wasn't time in class.

I'm seriously hoping it was just a glitch in my DD's classroom last year that made it happen so much, and that we won't see it happening again this year... they really do go to a wonderful school and we have very few complaints. But for us, this was a big one that I'm hoping has worked it's way out!!

[Jared]

I always got homework over weekends. It was MY responsibility to manage my time to get it done, and go to work, and have my personal time. I would always do my homework on Friday afternoons, so I would have all my weekends free. It's just about teaching time management skills, which they will need in college and beyond. TRUST ME, you don't get "weekends off" in college...

I agree. I graduated college in May and despised weekend homework, but I recognize why teachers assign it.

A previous poster asked if students deserve a couple days completely off to decompress from the week and spend time with family and friends. Ideally, yes. Practically, no.

School exists to help mold children into multidimensional and successful adults. I realize that the term "successful" means entirely different things to different people, but I expect the desire for professional and social triumphs remains nearly universal.

The world no longer operates on a five-day schedule. I know few, if any, adults I consider "successful" who truly take their weekends "off." They may not go to their offices, just like students do not go to school, but they do something.

To me, weekend homework appropriately simulates adult life. It teaches time management skills and shows kids the importance and necessity of diligence and work ethic. As the post above this one appropriately stated, college requires a seven-day workweek.

So does life.

Oh, I almost forgot. RedSoxFan, I hope your son at Syracuse is well.

[Janmac]

I hear you on the back to school rant, also. Our youngest grandson (who lives with us) graduated from high school in 2009 and what a joy it was not to have anyone waiting for the bus all last year! Our grandson had an I.E.P. (special needs) and it's amazing how many teachers - some of them relatively young - do not want to realize that an I.E.P. is law. The last two years were especially stressful as the principal was in the "I don't believe in I.E.P.s" camp. My cholesterol went down 20 points after our grandson graduated.

A couple of weeks ago our niece's daughter started kindergarten. She and her daughter live with us so we're in the thick of all the back to school adjusting. And it's only kindergarten. (sigh) On the upside, we're pretty sure there won't be any need for special programs.

The big fuss here this year is the free or reduced lunch program. This is a big deal in our school district. They must get a sizeable amount of their funding through this program. The school "requires" everyone to fill out the form. We know we don't qualify and we really don't care to share our financial information with anyone and especially a school office with less than impressively secure files. This seems like such a little thing but you would not believe how they push this.

And pretty soon we're going to start having discussions with the school about family vacation time. We live near a major seasonal tourist area so that's where most of the employment is but that's another rant.

Even with kindergarten supplies as limited and low cost as they are I wondered how struggling families manage as we filled the shopping cart. We live in a rural area with a very small school system (less than a thousand k-12). I doubt there are any of those programs that provide backpacks with supplies.

On the one hand, it's nice to know we can send our kids to school (think of Afghanistan, for example) but it sometimes it feels as tho we give up our kids to a monster of a bureaucracy.

Jan

[RedSoxFan]

Oh, I almost forgot. RedSoxFan, I hope your son at Syracuse is well.

Jared: Chris is doing very well. He is a reporter/producer at Channel 3/5 in Syracuse and loves it. Last week he gave a tour of the station to a sophomore class from Newhouse.

Hope you are doing well also.

[TheVBs]

The world no longer operates on a five-day schedule. I know few, if any, adults I consider "successful" who truly take their weekends "off." They may not go to their offices, just like students do not go to school, but they do something.

That's a shame. I know several in our town, with my DH topping the list. The weekend and vacations are family time. Not that there aren't occasionally exceptions where he has to work late, work on the weekend or go out of town, but thankfully it's not the norm.

And also thankfully, our schools (elementary at least) don't give homework on Fridays because they place a high value on family time as well. Obviously as they get into the higher grades, the work load will increase and they will likely need to devote some weekend time to work. At that point it will be good college prep/life training.

[MNNHFLTX]

And also thankfully, our schools (elementary at least) don't give homework on Fridays because they place a high value on family time as well. Obviously as they get into the higher grades, the work load will increase and they will likely need to devote some weekend time to work. At that point it will be good college prep/life training.

Growing up we almost always had homework over the weekends, from grade school on up, althought not so much over holiday breaks. I guess I never thought that it took away from family time, it was just something we got done and that was that. If I had one complaint when my son was in elementary, middle and high school is that they didn't give enough homework out. I would have preferred that he have even more direction in developing skills and knowledge in preparing them for advanced studies. So while I think it's not good for kids to be over-tasked, sometimes I think they need to pull back a bit from other extra-cirricular activies, not necessarily school work.

To the OP, about the cost/number of supplies--I can relate. I think we bought the same graphing calculator you mentioned for my son for his freshman year in college. I can't imagine why they would require it in high school when so many parents have no way of funding that type of purchase.

[TheVBs]

Growing up we almost always had homework over the weekends, from grade school on up, althought not so much over holiday breaks. I guess I never thought that it took away from family time, it was just something we got done and that was that. If I had one complaint when my son was in elementary, middle and high school is that they didn't give enough homework out. I would have preferred that he have even more direction in developing skills and knowledge in preparing them for advanced studies. So while I think it's not good for kids to be over-tasked, sometimes I think they need to pull back a bit from other extra-cirricular activies, not necessarily school work.

Chances are we as parents are far more conscious of what we think constitues family time than the kids are. And if/when homework starts getting assigned over weekends or breaks, we will have the same attitude, it's just something that needs to get done. Thankfully, I don't think our kids are short on homework or in school work, based upon the strides they've made. And I agree with not over-tasking on extra-curricular activities. Our girls have one activity each and they get to keep them as long as it doesn't interfere with their school performance. Granted, they're little, and as they get older we'd be willing to let them do more under the same conditions.

I agree with the OP on the paperwork issue! School only started here on the 7th and I already have a pile of flyers, teacher notes, PTO notes, schoolwork, etc.! I'm dreading getting organized.

[NewDVCowner]

I just wanted to make a comment about the homework load. Both of my parents were teachers and my sister is a middle school science teacher. My sister has figured out that the amount of time she is paid to be at school and the number of students in her she's paid to spend less than ten seconds per student per day. She is at the school long after the time she is required to be there and spends a lot of her weekends working on grading papers and getting ready for the upcoming weeks lessons. Not to mention the amount of money that she's spending out of pocket on the classroom supplies.

Her districts is also adding new things that she is required to teach every year. Her year is already filled up with the standards that she's required to teach and this year they've added an entire month worth of work that she is, again, required to teach. She litterally doesn't have time, even if the class is on schedule (which is saying nothing of the classes that may fall behind) to teach everything that the students need to learn. That very well could be a reason behind the extra homework.

[Janmac]

Regarding the homework load, there are many parents in our local school system who are incensed when even a little homework goes home, even during the week. Their thinking is that the school is where the learning occurs.

I think that homework, and reports which I hated to write when I was in school, are great ways to get students used to managing their time. As a student I never, if I could possibly get away with it, worked on a report until the very last minute, and then only enough to get by. As an adult, tho, I have - magically? - somehow acquired the ethic of turning out the required work without waiting til the last minute.

Reading some of the posts about how overwhelmed teachers are with paper work and teaching requirements, I'm wondering is anyone happy with the current situation?

Since Missouri went to standardized testing from 3rd grade on, most of the teachers are frustrated with having to "teach the test" which they don't want to do, but have learned they must, if enough students are to achieve adequate scores. So much depends on those test scores. They also feel that they are no longer teaching students, and are especially unhappy at having to abandon units that they worked hard on creating, that they felt were successful at promoting understanding of the subject matter for their students.

I don't know how we "fix" this but it certainly seems that everyone is unhappy in many ways.

Jan

[VWL Mom]

Thanks for all the responses, good to know I'm not alone.

Sherri. I do have a college frosh so I hear what you say about those costs. Ordering books was a real jaw dropper

PirateLover, I think you're my new teacher hero from spiral notebooks to in class projects. Morristown pays very well if your looking for a new job.

Janmac, this is his first year without an IEP. I always made him carry copies with him to hand out to teachers that either didn't have or didn't follow it.

I don't appreciate homework over breaks either: you don't want me to cut into "your time" then don't cut into "my time". If they have to work weekends or over vacations as adults then it will be their choice and they will be getting paid for it.

Group projects outside of school don't work at the HS level. These kids are so spread out trying to get the perfect resume for the perfect college that it is near impossible to get 2 of them let alone 4-5 of them together.

Regarding their time in general I guess I'm from the old school of thought where well rounded children become well rounded adults. IMO, needs to be about balance between school, family, play, etc.

[RedSoxFan]

VWL Mom: Agree with everything you said!! Family time is important.

As for college books; look into renting them. It can save you LOTS of money.
Send me a PM and I'll give you a great website my boys use. They are great and it's so easy.

[Ian]

Regarding their time in general I guess I'm from the old school of thought where well rounded children become well rounded adults. IMO, needs to be about balance between school, family, play, etc.

Totally agree. And I think what you're seeing with our well-publicized failures to adequately educate our children bears that out.

While I fully believe that classroom education is important, I do not believe it is the be-all/end-all of a child's development. Spending time with family and friends in a loving, supporting, and nurturing environment is as if not more important, IMO.

That's why I never hesitate to pull DS out of school for short family vacations and things like that. I personally think there's a dramatic over-emphasis on classroom education these days.

And again ... just so I don't get flamed too badly ... I'm not implying that school isn't important. It is. I just think it's an important component of developing a well-rounded, intelligent, self-sufficient child. It is not, however, the biggest component (again, IMO).

But I do feel like there's some solid evidence to back me up.

[princessgirls]

Since my girls have been back at school on September 1, it's been non-stop flurry of forms, papers, and money for lunches, pictures, field trips.

I am a TRUE believer in BALANCE!! School, dance, sports, church activities and down time for us. We work hard and play hard in my house...

I also am a Firm believer that the greatest gift we can give our children growing up is Family Time. I have no qualms about taking my kids out of school. I took them out on Friday to spend some time with family who was at the beach. My Mom was there with all her grandchildren playing on the beach, making memories with ALL of them. We made up all of our work on Sunday.
I don't do it often, my girls both got perfect attendance in 2008, but lately I see that when opportunity presents we must take it.
Cherish Today!
Julie